Getting a semi here thinking about what happens when Rom scores a hat trick
And then jizzes in her hair 😔
Then she sees you at the bar, and gives you a patronising friend-hug.
And you can see the jizz in her hair.
You get a doner on the way home, just as the shop is closing, and it's abysmal, and riddled with salmonella and AIDS.
You go home and cry wank.